Go Ahead and Flourish

I graduated in a class of less than 100 people. Most of those I’d known a majority of my life. We experienced ups and downs, new adventures, and learned to navigate very important years of our lives together. We laughed, we cried, and sometimes we knew each other better than we knew ourselves.

We grew up in a very small, majority Christian, conservative town. There wasn’t room for outsiders or lifestyles we didn’t understand. Not always intentionally, but as a byproduct of our upbringing and simply being sheltered from life’s realities.

There were a few people in our class that we sensed were holding things back, but they hid behind charades, knowing how our town would perceive them. You could tell in their mannerisms and personalities they were not being fully true to themselves, but how do you approach that topic when you’re not sure they realize it?

We graduated, and most of us left our small town. We gained experiences and insights that challenged our deeply held beliefs (which weren’t even that deep, just what we knew). We questioned ourselves, each other, and how we were raised.

Then, the most magical thing began happening little by little. People began accepting themselves for who they actually were, not who they were expected to be. Classmates changed career paths, political affiliations, some came out of the closet or embraced their real identity. We learned and continued to grow.

Some of these classmates weren’t who I hung out with in high school, but are now some of the people I respect the most because we’ve sat down and had hard conversations, challenged beliefs, and created a network of empathy and compassion.

Those classmates from earlier I mentioned that were hiding who they were? When they came out, they began to FLOURISH. Entire demeanors changed. Standing taller, smiling larger, eyes twinkling, absolutely glowing. They began pursuing their dreams and passions. Pouring that into themselves, their friends, and their communities.

Looking back, I realize they had adults somewhere in our lives that subtly let them know they were safe. They were accepted as they were. Unfortunately, not enough, and not soon enough. I cannot imagine the things that would have been accomplished if they had been shown that support earlier in their lives.

They say as you get older, you get more conservative, so I guess I’m going against the grain. The more I get out and experience the world, the more I believe we can do better, and we need to support everyone where they’re at. Compassion and empathy go a long way, but it’s lacking in huge chunks of the country because of beliefs we hold too tightly and refuse to challenge.

Watching how the world was changing since I graduated used to give me a lot of hope for the future. Kids knew they were safe and accepted. They were able to come into themselves earlier and build that life they wanted without having to leave their town to do it. We were progressing and making huge changes.

Then it all came crumbling down. These kids are being attacked and silenced for simply being themselves. They’re told they’re not worthy, they’re less than others, they don’t deserve any rights or protections. Teachers soon won’t be allowed to tell them they’re safe and accepted. Things are going to get ugly and lives are going to be ruined. It breaks my heart knowing the potential they could have is being stamped out before they ever get a chance to see it. Simply because some people have so much hate in their hearts for what is different that they refuse to allow space for it.

So I’m here to say, if no one has told you today:

You are worthy.

You are loved as you are.

You have support.

Go ahead and flourish.